One month in, how are your new year's resolutions holding up?
January has come and gone. The excitement of the new year, the goals, the vision boards, the promise of a fresh start has started to fade. For many, February brings a sick-to-the-stomach feeling, which goes something like this: “OMG, it’s February already! I haven’t even started on my new year’s goals! Where has the month gone?” Then a feeling of quiet panic, or perhaps terror, as you sit frozen not sure what actions to take next, and the dread that another year will pass you by without accomplishing what you set out to. Don’t stress, I am here, and will guide you through this. Now take a breath, know that you’re in safe hands, and read on.
The Australian Open, the power of witnessing brilliance, and what it has to do with you
The 2025 Australian Open Tennis was a masterclass in human potential, was it not? We witnessed countless exhibits of the extraordinary capability of the human body, mind and spirit. Players reaching and hitting impossible balls, serves at incredible speeds, incredible strategic adjustments mid-game, and epic comebacks from multiple sets down. Lessons to learn include that of perseverance, determination, focus, believing in yourself and adaptability in the face of challenges. So, what’s that got to do with our own unrealised new years’ goals?
Research shows that witnessing greatness, whether in sports, music, or any other field, can actually enhance our own well-being and reduce stress. It can expand our sense of what's possible in our own lives and may even inspire us to want to create that kind of drive and success in our own lives. So why is it that just as quickly as the thought of reaching our own greatness arises, we switch back to channel surfing, or hitting the snooze button on our morning alarm? You see, no matter how much we observe brilliance, there’s a physiological difference between feeling inspired, and actually taking action to change.
When inspiration becomes a barrier
We might consume motivational content, follow inspiring people, and tell ourselves I’ll start soon, but the truth is, inspiration without action can become an addictive cycle. Which is why February is here and our well-intended goals are still somewhere in January. If we get stuck in admiration, but never doing, it can create a psychological barrier, making our own goals feel more and more unattainable, or worse we feel too overwhelmed to even begin. So how do we break the cycle?
Why we stay stuck watching instead of doing
Every time we feel a spark of motivation and don’t act on it, we reinforce a subconscious pattern, that being the habit of observing rather than doing. Over time, this becomes our default state and a loop where we feel inspired but can never quite cross the threshold into action. Does the phrase, “I’ll start tomorrow”, sound familiar? You see our nervous system is wired for safety, so while watching others achieve greatness will light up neural pathways of inspiration within us, our subconscious mind can’t bypass that feeling of danger or threat that comes with the unknown, so rather than transform, it stays in its comfort zone, that is, unless we train it to do otherwise.
Neuroscientist and author Dr. Joe Dispenza teaches that we live in patterns shaped by past experiences. Our thoughts create emotions, emotions reinforce behaviours, and over time, these become deeply ingrained neural pathways. When we try to shift our lives, whether it’s starting a get fit plan, a new business, or creating a more expansive version of ourselves, as soon as we get closer to the point of change, our body will pull us back into what feels safe, our old identity, old habits and old ways of being.
So, we go back to watching, reading, thinking about change, but never fully embodying it. Not because we don’t want to, but because on a physiological level, we haven’t yet taught our nervous system that stepping into the unknown can be safe. Frustrating? Yes. An unchangeable habit? No.
Breaking the cycle: Become the player, not the spectator
If we want to stop just observing greatness and actually step into it we need to shift at a cellular level. That means:
Rewiring the nervous system for change. Instead of relying on willpower, we need to teach our bodies that stepping into the unknown isn’t a threat and that it isn’t going to harm us. To do this we need to repeatedly put our bodies into a subconscious state, where it is more open, and less resistant, to receiving suggestion, such as when we meditate, are under a gentle hypnosis or through visualisation practices. This can help create a state where change, and the new future state of being, becomes and feels more familiar and safe, rather than threatening.
Interrupting that thought-feeling-behaviour loop. If we continue thinking the same thoughts, we’ll keep feeling the same emotions and taking the same actions. And if we keep taking the same actions, we’ll keep feeling the same emotions and we continue to think the same thoughts… Get it? To break this cycle, we must consciously generate new thoughts that trigger different emotional states, or create different emotional states that leads to different thoughts. Doing so means reducing fear and increasing our curiosity. Going from self-doubt, to self-confidence. To do this step takes ongoing practice, and just like the tennis players, determination and perseverance. You need to be vigilant in self-observation, and each time you catch yourself on a thought, action or emotion that is not in line with the future goal, then immediately stop and consciously change that thought, emotion or action so that it is inline with your future goal or version of you.
Experiencing the future self now. This is the part that can seem difficult for many of us, instead of waiting for our external circumstances to change in order to think, feel and act differently, we need to act, feel and think like we have already changed. Neuroscience-backed research teaches to feel the success and confidence of our future self now and to believe it, as that is what leads to the shift. It’s that age-old adage fake it until you make it, however I reinterpret it to: feel it, act it, think it, until you are it. You see, our brains cannot distinguish between real and vividly imagined experiences. This means we can condition our nervous system for that future person we want to be, before it physically manifests. And, in this way we are teaching our nervous system that the new action, emotion and thought is not a threat, that it’s safe.
When we try to shift our lives, whether it’s starting a get fit plan, a new business, or creating a more expansive version of ourselves, as soon as we get closer to the point of change, our body will pull us back into what feels safe, our old identity, old habits and old ways of being.
When we do this inner work relentlessly, and over time, that is when we can move from observing brilliance to becoming it. Instead of admiring someone else’s discipline, we become the disciplined. Instead of watching others break limits, we break our own.
Actions you can start to take today
Work on discipline, not motivation. Top athletes don’t train based on how they feel that day, they follow a regimented system and plan that keeps them progressing no matter what. Design your own rituals and routines that make action non-negotiable. Whether it’s a morning meditation, a set writing schedule, or a daily workout, it’s consistency that rewires your neural pathways and what inevitably will move you from observer to participant.
Start small, low-threat shifts. Begin by gently stretching your comfort zone, change your morning routine, change the way you respond to a stressful text message, or simply pause more often to observe yourself in the moment and notice any ingrained behaviours, actions or emotions. These simple actions can be enough to spark change to old neural pathways, build trust and safety in your nervous system, and can be built upon, such that it will become easier to make bigger changes over time.
Teach your brain that the future is happening now. Instead of waiting to feel motivated, cultivate the emotions of success before it physically manifests. For example, what would it feel like to be fit and healthy, or to achieve a life long dream? How would you act as that future person, what might you be wearing, how might you speak, what is your tone of voice, what is your posture, what daily actions would that person take? If you start embodying those thoughts and feelings now your brain will naturally begin to shift your actions to match that emotional state.
When we train ourselves in this way, we stop being just spectators of greatness and instead we become the ones creating it. The moment you stop waiting for inspiration and start being it, your entire reality shifts.
Sources:
Watching sport enhances well-being: evidence from a multi-method approach. By Keita Kinoshita, Kento Nakagawa & Shintaro Sato. Pages 595-619, published online 22 Mar 2024. Link: https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/14413523.2024.2329831
This article is authored by Nicole Sultana, who holds a Post Graduate Degree in Spiritual Care, a Post Graduate Certificate in Business (Marketing), and a Bachelor of Applied Science in Exercise & Sports Science/Human Movement. In addition, she is a Certified Therapeutic Sound Practitioner and a Death Doula. Nicole is the founder of Sound Consciousness, a company that offers wellbeing strategies and therapeutic sound practices to help individuals achieve peak performance in their professional lives, relationships, and personal aspirations.
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